{"product_id":"km-technically-still-alive","title":"Technically Still Alive Funny Dead Houseplant T-Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eTechnically Still Alive — a ring of brown curled foliage, and one green leaf holding up the claim.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003ePrinted one at a time on a Comfort Colors 1717 — garment-dyed, heavyweight ring-spun cotton that softens with every wash. Made to order in the USA.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eArtwork created in-house with the assistance of AI image tools and finished by hand.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFit\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eUnisex, true to size — order the size you normally wear. Relaxed through the body; size up for an oversized look. Full measurements are in the size chart photo.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMade \u0026amp; shipped\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003ePrinted to order in the USA. Most orders ship within 3–5 business days, then 3–5 days in transit.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eReturns\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e30 days, no questions asked — fewer than 1% of our customers ever need it.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eMachine wash cold inside out, tumble dry low. 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